Not Me…I’m Different

by The Pawhealer

It seems to me that I am always defending my many personal differences to my friends...You see, I choose to hang out with my dog family rather than do almost anything else; and I like it that way. I guess it could be said that I am quirky, or that I could be described as somewhat "different".

Take for example the telephone conversation I had today with my friend Rebecca. First of all, she is four years older than I am, that's just enough of an age difference, so that we quite don't see things eye to eye.....Here we go:

Rebecca: "Hi Holly"

Me: "Hey Rebecca what’s going on?"

Rebecca: "Oh.... I just read your blog today" (silence)

Me: "Yea and..."

Me: "How did ya like it?"

Rebecca: "Well.....It seems like this blog thing ( not said in a complimentary tone) is a really good form of therapy for you. (silence)"

Me: (Oh brother, obviously she doesn't get it, my blogs are supposed to be clever and witty.) "Rebecca, there's all types of posts on my blog, not just the one about my mother (referring to to my blog called "Mama's Little Girl") There are all kinds of posts about my dogs and other fun stuff, have ya read em?"

Rebecca: "Yes, and I have to tell you that I'm really worried about you." (Her words are long and drawn out, as she speaks with her high pitched nasal twanged voice that always seems to annoy me.)

Me: "What are ya talking about? Why are you worried about me?"

Rebecca: "Because you don't seem at all interested in getting a man."

Me: "Rebecca, we've gone over this before, I don't feel like I need a guy. I am perfectly happy hanging out with my dogs, I love my life, it’s uncomplicated and I don't feel at all lonely. Let's do a reality check here....Lets see; I've had twenty two years of marriage, and then there was that five years of a long term relationship; Rebecca, I think I'm okay in this department; Been there and done that...."

Now the subject takes a different direction as we begin to start talking about my mother. The conversation went something like this:

"Geez, my mom is doing terrible...Her back is in really bad condition, 'cause she's now completely bent over in the shape of an L, and when she walks, she is shuffling like a little old lady."

I go onto to say:

"It’s terrible to watch your mother get old....and its even worse because she won't interact with anyone including her own family. She just stays in her house, never goes out anywhere, with only her dog for company, and she likes it that way..."

Then with an air of confidence and bravado as if I have a crystal ball looking into the future, I staunchly say;

"I'll never be like that"

Rebecca then gleefully jumps back into the conversation as if this is some kinda "Ahh Haa" gotcha type of moment; Voice cackling and with authority she says to me;

"Holly, don't you see? You're just like your mother!"

Ohh; I was utterly and totally offended at this observation! I of course then responded by offering a complete denial of the statement and then I said;

"Come on Rebecca, I am completely different from my mom, as I self righteously defended myself against such an awful allegation, the wind then began to slowly seep out of my sails."

As I was making the case that my own special dog loving ways, as well as my own particular anti-social tendencies, are indeed a much different baliwick than my mom's odd behavior; I began to notice, that my own argument did indeed seem to sound somewhat hollow; It was at that moment that a most disturbing thought dared to pass through my mind:

Wait a minute, could it be that just maybe; I'm really not so different after all?

Because when I think about it; I do sound a tad bit like my mother...

Plus I can't forget the fact (because I could hear my father's voice of the past, which was reverberating in the back of my head):

"You are your mother's daughter":

Then could it possibly really be?

That I'm really not so different after all,

Have I now become my mother?